Let’s tell a story about Australia. A movie, of sorts. Let’s make a movie about Australia that can be shown in other countries. A movie that will help to tell the truth about Australia: to dispel all those silly myths about Australian culture. It could be about rickety boats, and people drowning in the sea. Maybe it could also be about islands that don’t belong in Australia’s territories anymore, and big Navy ships that patrol the borders, pushing back those tiny boats. It should probably also include lip-sewing, starvation and cutting, and of course, we can’t leave out the sexual abuse of children. We want the real Australia in there. We’d need some great close ups on faces: the wide-eyed terror, confusion and desperation. I wonder if we could weave in this really great anecdote, the one about the family that sat on the boat holding each other’s hands, vowing to never let go… If one of us drowns, we all drown together. Let’s get a scriptwriter in to freshen up the dialogue a little.
And the movie would have a really strong message, a moral. It’d be something like; please be careful out on the water, we in Australia really care about you. Possibly. We’ll see how the drafts of the script go, and what angle the director wants to take on it. We’re also tossing up another message along the lines of: Stop coming to Australia in your boats and making us look bad and weak. Please stay in your own country and do that application thing that we’re 100% sure is working correctly without any corruption, delays or possibility of being killed by your own governments. If you really have to get killed, please don’t do it in our waters. I know, it’s a bit long and wordy. This is complex stuff.
So, let’s get out there and tell a story about Australia. The funding’s already in place, we’ve got a director and a production company, even working on a title. We’re thinking of calling the movie; “Lost at sea - where the bloody hell are you?” but it feels like it’s been done before. Any ideas?